It’s true. Kids say the dardest things. My love nugget has ZERO filter and often busts out with some random gems. Just imagine a 3 year old saying this stuff. He so cray!
Here are some of my favorites:
1. “Mommy!! Mommy!! My penis looks like an army guy.” Yeah, I guess he’s right. Just please wait a while before you unload any ammo.
2. “I wanna wear big underpants like you Mama.” Excuuuuse me? He got a time-out for that one. Punk. 
3.”Where’s your meemee? Where did it go??!!” He was so confused because I didn’t have a penis. I told him I tucked. 
4. “No dancing! NOOOOO!!!!” He actually gets angry sometimes! If he says this now imagine how he’s going to feel when I’m cutting a rug at his school dance. It’s a good thing I have mad skillz.
5. “Aminals are my friends and I don’t eat my friends.” Hells yeah I force that one down his throat (and yes, it’s AMinals).He’ll understand it at some point. In the meantime I just like hearing it :)
6. While taking a walk a neighbor said, “Well good morning to you!” to which Zekey replied: “And Happy Birthday to you!” Oookkaaayyy.
7. First he named our cat House Guy. Then he changed it to Race Car. She now goes by Race Car-House Guy. WTH??
8. He farted, “caught” it in his hand and pretended to give it to me, proclaiming “Here Mommy. I made you a pumpkin.” Thank you?
9. I wasn’t privy to this one but it bears repeating. He said to his dad, “Daddy, you have big balls. Not me. I have gumballs.” Sure kid. You keep telling yourself that.
10.What historical figure’s birthday do we celebrate on Christmas Day? Cheez-it! Yup. That’s right. Not Jesus. Nah, Zekey calls him CHEEZ-IT.
11. Speaking of cheese, I asked him if he wanted a grilled cheese and he exclaimed, “Nooo! I don’t want GIRLS’S CHEESE. I’m a BOY!” So I made him a peanut butter and jelly.
12. And my personal favorite. “Mommy, you’re a good woman.” You betta recognize! Not every Mom is going to let you wear this to the park. 
Dang, I love this little twit.
What about your kids? I’m sure they have said some zingers too! Let’s hear ’em!
“Mommy don’t eat cheese… but Mommy should cheese because cheese is SO goooood.”
I’m not a mom to a human, but I did say some weird things as a child. My mom keeps a book of quotes I’ve said over the years. I’m really glad she did. One of my faves is “Mommy, I will make the decisions in my life and you will make the decisions in yours.” I was 3 years old. I haven’t changed much since then.
Ha! Yeah, sounds about right.
“When I get bigger and BIGGER I will have a big meemee too… right Daddy?”
…noticing a theme a meemee/size theme. I hope this is not an indicator of future “problems” for him/us.
A bit redundant… but one of my favorites:
Z: “Daddy can I have a bite of your cheeseburger?”
Me: “No you can’t have a bite because my cheeseburger has meat on it it.”
Z: “Oh yeah… and meat is aminyals. I don’t eat aminyals. I love aminyals.”
Avi and I were surprised not to see the “where his balls?” quote. Btw, this post had us dying on the drive from Portland to Seattle.