I saw Purple Rain in the theater on opening night, July 27, 1984. I was 12. Prince’s sexiness freaked me out and drew me in. I STILL recall how I felt when I saw the sex scene with Appolonia! Remember when she comes down to his basement bedroom and they start making out? When he is, ahem, hugging her from behind and touching her private parts? I was scared, excited and…obsessed. Even though I didn’t understand half of it, the entire movie was a porno for me. I had no clue what “Come back Nikki! Come back! Your dirty little Prince wanna grind!!” meant, but I knew it was good and I didn’t give a fuck what Nikki wanted to do. I was coming back fo sho!

I breathed Purple Rain, playing the album endlessly, wishing I could be Apollonia. I still have the original movie poster. The Beautiful Ones got the most play time. Still does. “What’s it gonna be Baby? Do you want him, OR DO YOU WANT ME? …I’m BEGGING DOWN ON MY KNEES, I WANT YOU!” Can you imagine a man saying that to you?  I’m talking about a fine ass man like Prince. Not some stalker type. He had so much power in that scene! Gah!!

A few years later I saw him with The Revolution (!) on the Parade tour. I am sad to say that I don’t remember much about that show. I smoked some weed and everything is a blur. I know we searched for my car for hours after, only to discover I parked on the other side of the coliseum. A high school friend recently reminded me that I told her he entered the stage via a rope and wearing a jock strap. Very likely.

After Parade, I went backwards and got super into For You. My favorite song was “Soft and Wet.” I thought he was talking about a girl’s skin when she got out of the shower.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Years went by and while my taste in music shifted, there was always at least one Prince song on my many mix tapes. Always gotta keep it funky, y’all.

It was a good 10 years or so later that our relationship really reignited. My mom’s husband Ralph was a staple at a casino in Reno and they often gave him perks in exchange for his 10 hours of impenetrable attention to the slots. Prince was playing in Reno and Ralph the Whale need only inquire about tickets to the show. Next thing you know I had a driver, a suite at the casino, amazing seats and personal bartender. It’s good to be the minnow.

I was dressed to the purple nines, sporting a fabulous zip-up bustier, glitter all over ma body and 2.5 inch stilettos, putting me at over 6 ft tall. It doesn’t matter how uncomfortable you are at a Prince show-you MUST represent. Alas, this elevation came back to haunt me when elite members of the audience were asked to join his Purple Holiness for a dance session onstage. I was close enough that the bodyguards came to my row for participants. Given that I was the blonde Apollonia I was certain I’d be swooped up and even started the journey to the stage on my own, only to be crestfallen when I was turned away for being “too tall”. That cut me deep at the time but I can laugh about it now. I guess if I were 5’2 I wouldn’t want an amazon blonde gyrating all up on me either!

Shortly after that, Prince started a pay-to-join website for die hard fans. It was $99 and included free music and knowledge of shows before the general public. You bet your sweet ass I joined and as a result I got kick ass seats to a show on the Musicology tour. The stage was a giant purple symbol and the show was other-worldly.

He sang The Beautiful Ones, full on Purple Rain style-screaming and all. PheFUCKenominal. He also had every boy, girl and in-transisition’s purple lace panties on the stage for an acoustic version of “Shhh….”. If you aren’t familiar with that song, you need only know the line “I’d rather do you after school like some homework…” to understand.

The final song of the night was Purple Rain, as it often is. You know those videos of popular bands playing in Japan or Brazil and the ENTIRE crowd is out of their minds singing, arms flailing overhead? This moment was like that. There wasn’t a soul in there who didn’t sing along and wave their arms back and forth. We were all in love with him and he with us and us with each other. I have yet to experience that feeling again. It was INTENSE.

I have had the opportunity to see him a few more times at arenas, but I passed. Unless I can get great seats at a large venue, I’m happy to have my memories. Rather than spend an arm and a leg on a nose bleed seat, I spent $50 professing my love for my little man on my own arm!

Recently, the Purple Gods shined down on me and I got tickets to see him at the Fillmore in San Francisco. Capacity for the venue is just over 1,000 and it was a benefit show for a local charity. My man is a good man.

Prince played til 3am.  It was amazing. While he did play some hits, it was more like a jam session, and a FUNKY one at that. He played lots of piano and his new guitar player is AMAZEBALLS. The bass player can FUNK some shit up and the drummer is gorgeous and looks like she’s 12.  For most of the show it was just the 4 of them jammin’. He was a dancing machine and the level of musicianship is through the roof.

He was so damn sexy. He had his hair flattened and had a scarf tied around his head and a black hat on. It was stunning. A most beautiful look.

I was about 20 feet away from him for most of the show. I could smell him. It was Essence of God. The sex and charisma were palpable and I’m pretty sure that I am now pregnant. During “Something in the Water” he brought the crowd to tears and at one point said “I want to cum inside of you” then he said “I want to feel the 3 us of together.” OMG. WHAT? His guitar has vaginas on it. That’s right. VAGINAS.

He played for 2.5 hours and had two encores when the lights came on and the show was over. Everyone started to leave and I was at the back of the line to exit. About 70% of the crowd was gone and all of a sudden the lights went dim and HE CAME OUT AND SANG PURPLE RAIN TO ABOUT 300 OF US. I’m crying as I type this. It was a DREAM. A PURPLE DREAM. It seriously felt as though he was singing directly to me and I know everyone else felt the same way. Magical.

Prince is a hormone surge, a sexual awakening, a soulful rebirth. He took my virginity, wrapped it up in purple satin sheets and stuffed it in his stiletto boots. I’ve had many crushes on musicians (just check out my last name to know how overboard I can go) but Prince is a part of my life. He makes me feel like one of The Beautiful Ones and damn straight, I wanna Grind. Grind. Grind.